Lara declared:

Oh Vladimir… You’re So Handsome (Not)

Monday, August 27th, 2007 at 12:20 pm

putin.jpg

In this photo we see the fantastic Russian President Vladimir Putin as he fishes in the Yenisei River in Siberia. Mr. Poopin was touring the area with Prince Albert II of Monaco.

More you say? OK!
putin2.jpg

Want to learn the work out YOU NEED for Vladimir’s hot bod? Pick up your local copy of Komsomolskaya Pravda.

Meanwhile, (in news that actually matters) I was able to get my hands on a copy of Blowing Up Russia: The Secret Plot to Bring Back KGB Terror (sadly only signed by one of the authors). My parents were fortunate enough to attend an interview with Mr. Yuri Felshtinsky. The coauthor, Alexander Litvinenko was poisoned with a hideously lethal dose of polonium-210 by the resurging “KGB” (aka the FSB) of Russian.

Understanding the total devolution Russian is undergoing is mind-numbingly hideous. They’re stepping right back into their Soviet past, and this book does an excellent job of pointing out every Russian misstep the world is missing.

From the editorial note at Amazon:

Blowing Up Russia contains the allegations of ex-spy Alexander Litvinenko against his former spymasters in Moscow which led to his being murdered in London in November 2006. In the book he and historian Yuri Felshtinsky detail how since 1999 the Russian secret service has been hatching a plot to return to the terror that was the hallmark of the KGB. Vividly written and based on Litvinenko’s 20 years of insider knowledge of Russian spy campaigns, Blowing Up Russia describes how the successor of the KGB fabricated terrorist attacks and launched a war. Writing about Litvinenko, the surviving co-author recounts how the banning of the book in Russia led to three earlier deaths.

A bit more about Litvienko and Putin:

This book is not about the murder of Alexander Litvinenko. But it is the book that got him murdered. If you imagine Russia as a nation on the mend from its communist sickness, think again. The former KGB and FSB operative (Litvienko) and his academic friend (Felshtinsky) published their book in Russia and it enraged Don Vito Putin. […] As Litvenko lay dying he wrote the following to Putin:

“You may succeed in silencing me but that silence comes at a price. You have shown yourself to be as barbaric and ruthless as your most hostile critics have claimed.

“You have shown yourself to have no respect for life, liberty or any civilized value.”

And more:

BOOM! - In late 2003 nearly 4,500 copies of this book were seized and confiscated by the Russian Secret Service (FSB) as they tried to make their way from Latvia printing presses into Moscow. And no wonder. This book focuses on how elements of the old Soviet regime sought to steer Russia away from the liberal reforms since the fall of the old USSR. The multiple apartment bombings which ripped across the country in 1999, killing hundreds, were more than suspicious. The ‘terrorists’ were condemned and the tragedies quickly used as an excuse to drag Russia into a second wretched war with Chechnya which continues to this day. The book’s spotlight on the attempted bombing in Ryazan leaves little doubt as to who the enemy really was.

Still not convinced Russia is evil? I leave you to the 2.6 million hits at Google and La Russophobe.

Lara declared:

How to make a baby cry

Tuesday, August 14th, 2007 at 9:21 pm

sumobaby.jpg
Baby-crying contest in Tokyo

A baby, held by amateur sumo wrestler, cries loudly during a baby-crying contest at Sensoji temple in Tokyo April 28, 2007. Eighty-four babies born in 2006 took part in the event, which is held to pray for the babies’ health and growth. The winner of the contest is the baby who cries the loudest. (Xinhua/Reuters Photo)

P.S. Sorry for the slight hiatus! We’re all working a fantastic Ukrainian dance camp right now for 7-16 year olds. Fun fun! Blogging back next week! (And maybe photos too.)

Lara declared:

Greetings from Mars

Tuesday, July 10th, 2007 at 5:26 pm

Well, with two-thirds of us here at workshop, not much blogging has been done. Whoops!

Anyways, it’s been running at 96 degrees Fahrenheit here for the last two days - and of course there’s no air-conditioning silly! This is Ukrainian dance workshop! (By the way - we’ll be performing for about 4-5,000 people at this weekend’s massive festival. Just think of Woodstock for Ukrainian-Americans.)

Anyways, we’re all having boat-loads of fun waking up at 9am for a three and a half hour ballet class (yes, the boys take ballet) and then dancing (in total) for about 10 hours a day. Yay!

To keep you up on the latest absurdities in the world, I’ll be posting some random amusing stories here. Read away:

Lara declared:

Vodka = Little Water

Wednesday, June 27th, 2007 at 12:28 pm

smirnoffsource.jpgSmirinoff has picked up on the latest trend in underage drinking (throw your favorite clear liquor into a Poland Spring bottle!). Say what?

Smirnoff Source™, the new premium malt beverage offering from Diageo North America that combines pure spring water with alcohol is now on beer retailers’ shelves and high-end bars throughout the Northeast. At 3.5 percent alcohol by volume (ABV), this new premium malt beverage, with a hint of citrus, has fewer calories and lower alcohol by volume than most popular domestic beers.

EXCELLENT!

Take one part useless expensive glass water bottle design, 10 parts tap water (thrown in a “spring water purifier”), and 1/3 part cheap grain alcohol and you get Lindsay Lohan’s new drink of choice.

Here’s a first-hand experience with the drink from Jezebel:

Unfortunately the packaging left something to be desired; glass and sized for man-hands, most of the free promotional bottles were found shattered on the dance floor by the end of the night. (I hope Diageo has good insurance!) Another slight problem was that one of my more-drunk friends mistook the Source bottle for water (How could she? I mean it even says “SPRING WATER: with a touch of alcohol” in small print…) and then proceeded to vomit. A lot. (”It tastes just like water, only the WHOLE TIME IT’S DEHYDRATING YOU,” she mused later.) For more veteran drunks such as myself, however, I think Smirnoff Source may even serve as a hangover helper due to its spring water content; I awoke the following afternon curiously merely groggy-ish (I had, admittedly, consumed a thousand or so calories worth of fries). But I’m not here to state scientific fact, I’m here to state my opinion. Which is: I would drink the Sauce, er, “Source” again, gladly, after a dozen or so real drinks. - CHERYL CAMPBELL

And, if you didn’t know, the origins of the word “Vodka”are from the Russian phrase of “little water.”

Source: Diageo Press Release

Lara declared:

Graduation

Saturday, June 23rd, 2007 at 10:33 am

Every generation imagines itself to be more intelligent than the one that went before it, and wiser than the one that comes after it.
- George Orwell

So today is the day (well actually it was Thursday) - the time at which I move on from my slight beginnings at high school to the grand life of college in Manhattan (actually, today is just the party.)

WOOOHOOO! PARTY!

Here’s to graduates, graduations, and their parties everywhere.

Lara declared:

A Rabbi has friended me

Thursday, May 31st, 2007 at 10:58 pm

facebookfriend.pngA Rabbi has friended me on Facebook.

After joining the Columbia network (Facebook lumped Barnard College into Columbia’s network…. those bastards, haha) I have received a slew of friend requested from my future classmates. After going through the lot, I came to a unique solicitation:

Rabbi Yonah added you as a friend on Facebook. We need you to confirm that you are, in fact, friends with Rabbi Yonah.

To confirm this friend request, follow the link below:
http://columbia.facebook.com/reqs.php

Thanks,
The Facebook Team

I am, in fact, not friends with Rabbi Yonah. I’m not even Jewish. Excusing the fact that I am a Ukrainian Christian… what is a Rabbi doing on Facebook? One look to his profile and you’ll see that he’s quite a young member of the Columbia staff and heads various Jewish groups on campus. Interesting bit of networking he’s doing here.

Can I friend the Pope?

Lara declared:

lalaladyLara

Friday, May 11th, 2007 at 6:41 pm

So, I am purchasing a new personal domain (lalaladylara.com) and I really want to go with a funky design on this one. I want a design that will stay there. Not something seasonal… I’d really like it to be my branding so the option to just change a few things every so often is there.

Obviously, it makes sense to weave photos into it for a dynamic feel… but I’m really not into displaying my personal life and that sort of thing. Personal flickr displays on my blog just aren’t me. Anyways, here’s what I’ve come up with:

  • Candy - lots of web 2.0ish, glassy, shiny, bright colors
  • Wild West - a la a bit of this.
  • Diner - you know. Classic 50s sort of look.

Obviously I’m going for something on the artistic side here, but I’m afraid that these styles are played out. Perhaps… a Ukrainian dance theme? Hmm…. Come to think of it, I wouldn’t mind sharing those photos of myself. I mean, we wear traditional clothing while the guys do old-world break dancing and we look sexy switching our feet in combinations you can’t even comprehend. All while doing hand stands on our guys’ shoulders