Crunchy Mustard

So election day is rolling around this Tuesday and as an American it is my civic duty to make a decision on not only which rich white man will win our various national and local seats, but some very pressing “PUBLIC QUESTIONS TO BE VOTED UPON” as well.

These are my favorite; all they require is a simple yes or no. It makes me seem like I’m actually making a difference, although I’m nearly positive it doesn’t matter whether or not I personally approve the $450 million stem cell research bond issue.

As any registered voter knows (at least in the U.S.) one will receive a preview of what the ballot is going to look like when you walk into that little booth. Everything is laid out plain and simply, so you can remember where to put your finger (genius). Scanning down the list of “QUESTIONS TO BE VOTED UPON” my mother quickly instructed me to “vote no to everything” as it only means more ridiculous tax money from my parents sent to the failing urban centers and ridiculously corrupt New Jersey government.

On to the questions…

Number 1: More property tax; no thank you. Number 2: $450 for stem cell research; let the pharmaceutical companies do it. Number 3: Green Acres, Farmland Blue acres, and Historic preservation bond act of 2007; ok fine, this one is legit.

AND FINALLY:
State Question No. 4
Constitutional amendment concerning the right to vote for certain persons.
Shall the amendment of Article II, Section I, paragraph 6 of the Constitution agreed to by the Legislature revising the current constitutional language concerning denial of the right to vote by deleting the phrase “idiot or insane person” and providing instead that a “person who has been adjudicated by a court of competent jurisdiction to lack the capacity to understand the act of voting” shall not enjoy the right of suffrage, be adopted?

Dude, you’re an idiot, you can’t vote.

Look at this gem taken by Google Earth of navy barracks in California built in the 1960s. The Navy has decided to mask the building with more landscaping… the cost? 600,000 tax-payer dollars.

Watch the CNN video of the swastika building here.

The President of Iran - HIS EXCELLENCY - Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, spoke at my dear Columbia campus today. The spectacle was quite a site. Plus, I don’t think I could have loved President Bollinger’s opening speech anymore.

It’s all better told in photos. Want the words? Head over to the “Ahmadineblog” at the Columbia Daily Spectator which I helped set up.

You’re on Flickr Mahmoud: http://www.flickr.com/photos/larac/sets/72157602137862384/

In this photo we see the fantastic Russian President Vladimir Putin as he fishes in the Yenisei River in Siberia. Mr. Poopin was touring the area with Prince Albert II of Monaco.

More you say? OK!

Want to learn the work out YOU NEED for Vladimir’s hot bod? Pick up your local copy of Komsomolskaya Pravda.

Meanwhile, (in news that actually matters) I was able to get my hands on a copy of Blowing Up Russia: The Secret Plot to Bring Back KGB Terror (sadly only signed by one of the authors). My parents were fortunate enough to attend an interview with Mr. Yuri Felshtinsky. The coauthor, Alexander Litvinenko was poisoned with a hideously lethal dose of polonium-210 by the resurging “KGB” (aka the FSB) of Russian.

Understanding the total devolution Russian is undergoing is mind-numbingly hideous. They’re stepping right back into their Soviet past, and this book does an excellent job of pointing out every Russian misstep the world is missing.

From the editorial note at Amazon:

Blowing Up Russia contains the allegations of ex-spy Alexander Litvinenko against his former spymasters in Moscow which led to his being murdered in London in November 2006. In the book he and historian Yuri Felshtinsky detail how since 1999 the Russian secret service has been hatching a plot to return to the terror that was the hallmark of the KGB. Vividly written and based on Litvinenko’s 20 years of insider knowledge of Russian spy campaigns, Blowing Up Russia describes how the successor of the KGB fabricated terrorist attacks and launched a war. Writing about Litvinenko, the surviving co-author recounts how the banning of the book in Russia led to three earlier deaths.

A bit more about Litvienko and Putin:

This book is not about the murder of Alexander Litvinenko. But it is the book that got him murdered. If you imagine Russia as a nation on the mend from its communist sickness, think again. The former KGB and FSB operative (Litvienko) and his academic friend (Felshtinsky) published their book in Russia and it enraged Don Vito Putin. […] As Litvenko lay dying he wrote the following to Putin:

“You may succeed in silencing me but that silence comes at a price. You have shown yourself to be as barbaric and ruthless as your most hostile critics have claimed.

“You have shown yourself to have no respect for life, liberty or any civilized value.”

And more:

BOOM! - In late 2003 nearly 4,500 copies of this book were seized and confiscated by the Russian Secret Service (FSB) as they tried to make their way from Latvia printing presses into Moscow. And no wonder. This book focuses on how elements of the old Soviet regime sought to steer Russia away from the liberal reforms since the fall of the old USSR. The multiple apartment bombings which ripped across the country in 1999, killing hundreds, were more than suspicious. The ‘terrorists’ were condemned and the tragedies quickly used as an excuse to drag Russia into a second wretched war with Chechnya which continues to this day. The book’s spotlight on the attempted bombing in Ryazan leaves little doubt as to who the enemy really was.

Still not convinced Russia is evil? I leave you to the 2.6 million hits at Google and La Russophobe.

Yesterday I clicked through an interesting ad declaring… “Run for President of the United States.” I said to myself, “Ok. People love me. I’ll totally win!”

The site loaded and a shabby design appeared. A small line detailed:

Welcome to U4prez.com - 06/04/2007 09:06 pm
The site that lets anyone run for president of the United States of America. To begin your campaign just register with your platform. Register by clicking here.

Each day a new runoff occurs in which two users battle against each other… to become ruler of the free world. Yesterday’s runoff was between Reflection and Ruben. Wow.

Name: Ruben Aragon
Age: 17
Location: Albuquerque, United States of America
My favorite president: John F. Kennedy
My worst president: James K. Polk
My number 1 issue: Enviorment
What I would do if president: Energy Independance
Bio: I’m pretty average in that I love video games and surfing the web. Movies are a definate interest of mine and I’m hoping to one day work on them. I enjoy building Models, listening to music(country and classic rock)

Excusing the fact that Ruben is no where near the age to win the presidency (35 years old), I think his love for video games and the internet are admirable traits. Reflection, on the other hand, is where it’s at. He’s got his stuff down:

Name: Michael Billy
Age: 19
Location: Pittsburgh, United States of America
My favorite president: Thomas Jefferson
My worst president: LBJ, FDR, Bush, Reagan… Everyone after 1880
My number 1 issue: War on Drugs
What I would do if president: Promote Liberty
Soundbite: America has strayed from the path the Founding Fathers laid before it. It is time to get back on that path. Freedom will follow. http://www.rottingnation.com

Promote Liberty. I like that. His soundbite is a gem too.

So go run for President and change the world while you’re at it. I’ll vote for you. U4Prez.com.

In the video above Hasselback absolutely puts Rosie in her place on The View. Rosie can’t even answer her own questions and she throws out all the classic short stops: “Big fat lesbian Rosie,” “Iraq didn’t attack us,” and in her final blunder she stoops so low as to call Elisabeth a coward. In the end, she’s completely embarrassed and put in her place.

Oprah Winfrey told a crowd of 30,000 at Howard University’s commencement Saturday that her grandmother’s wish was for her to get “some good white folks” to work for. “I regret that she didn’t live past 1963 and see that I did get some really good white folks,” the talk show queen said, “working for me.”

I got some really goo’ black foolks’ workin’ for me too.

Uhh… not really, but can I just through the double standard out here again? How ridiculous would that statement be if I meant it? I’d be pounced on and executed!

Oh, and if you didn’t notice, Howard University is all black. It’s “affectionately known as ‘the black Harvard’” and is “the number one producer of African American Ph.D.s in the nation,” according to Wikipedia.

Source: Daily News

“There’s a party up at Schindler’s and I’m on his A-list”

Best Comment and reply:
Muschimattes (6 days ago)
Im German but i hate Hitler and racsim!!!! I hope so shit never comes back to germany but bush is the return of Hitler!!!!!!!

Yes young Muschimattes… Bush has indeed killed millions and has taken over an entire government seemingly single-handedly. He’s invaded Russia, and made friends with Mussolini. I certainly see the resemblance.

Either way, this is a terribly funny video. Thank you The Whitest Kids.

Here is my (late) reflection on May day:

Celebrate Communism!
It only killed 110 million people.

Gotta love the Columbia College Republicans. I can’t wait to get over there to tear this liberal garbage apart.

So you don’t have to sift through the comments:

Good comment:

Posted by what: [#17] [reply]
( posted May 2, 2007 at 3:08 AM )
about all the lives capitalism has saved? What about all the years it has added to the world’s population?

Medicine? Technology? Industry? Universities?

Historians believe 9.4 and 12 million slaves arrived in the New World. Disregarding the fact that neither slavery nor mercantilism is capitalist (as capitalism requires a non zero-sum transaction), if we BUMP the number up to 20 million and considered every one of those lives “lost” or dead, that’s TWENTY MILLION FEWER than the number of lives lost in Mao’s China under the Great Leap alone.

Nobody said capitalism is perfect, but for all those who have suffered under the system, it was due to the system, not because of some government agent’s grudge or incompetence.

Stupid Comment:

Posted by erf?: [#23] [reply]
( posted May 2, 2007 at 8:39 AM )
I don’t think it’s fair to say either Communism OR Capitalism really killed anybody. Ideologies don’t kill people — people kill people.

Excellent Comment:

Posted by die, pussy: [#32] [reply] (in reply to #24)
( posted May 2, 2007 at 3:26 PM )
awwww poor wittle communists got their wittle feewings hurt by the wepubwicans